1 game and 2 funerals
by WaiWaiTomodachi
Summary: Denmark wants to horseplay with someone because sometimes, you just get these manly urges to be reckless. It seems that Sweden is the only formidable opponent in the house. Denmark will do whatever he can to get the game started between the two but he also, unintentionally starts something else.


Three consecutive yawns escaped Denmark's mouth as he watched the other four Nordics go on with their business for the past hour; Sweden was sitting on his favourite armchair and reading the newspaper. Finland was sitting on the floor and grooming the adorable little ball of fur, Hanatamago. Norway was sitting on the comfy sofa, focused on watching the television just like his brother, Iceland who was next to him. The two biological brothers seemed far too close for Denmark's liking_, "Stupid Aisu try 'a take away my Norge", _he murmured to himself. Unable to deal with the situation anymore, his eccentric mind came up with a fantastic pastime, a little horseplay with Sweden should make this unbearable boredom go away!

"Hey Sve, How's about a little wrestling, you and me? The winner gets a piggy back ride around the world meeting hall tomorrow from the loser, what do you say Sve?" Denmark challenged the giant, stoic nation. "N'." Sweden promptly replies to Denmark's childish remark but the Dane refused to give up and continued to pester Sweden, "Come on, man! Too scared to challenge the King of the north?" Denmark roared. A subtle sigh escaped Sweden's mouth, which was followed by, "F'rstly, 'm n't scar'd 'f y'u 'nd sec'ndly, y'u ar' n't th' K'ng." The petty argument grabbed the attention of Norway and Iceland, the two brothers began to bet on who will lose. "Ha! You're just scared that you will lose and cry about it!" Denmark barked at the other nation, who was becoming more irritated by the Dane, Sweden tried his best to stay calm and collect, not replying back to the tormentor.

Not getting the expected result, a punch to his face, Denmark resort to another method to provoke the stoic man; insult his appearance! "I see, then you leave me with no choice!" Denmark bellowed at the tall, irritated gentleman. "Those glasses make you look stupid!" Denmark insulted the man. "Th'se l'ttle Leg's ar' th'e wors' th'ng ev'r 'nvent'd!" Sweden counteracted to Denmark's insult. Denmark was deeply offended by Sweden's words, "You take that back, you asshole! Nobody disrespects my Legos!", "W'll I jus' d'd!" Sweden shouted back to his frenemy in a sassy manner. Finland, decided that this little act had gone on long enough and decided to intervene, "C-come on guys, let's all settle down and watch some movies together, o-okay?" Finland said before Denmark riled up Sweden once more, "Your wife is a slut who goes around everyone's house, every year!" Denmark quickly apologised to Finland after saying his obscene comment, before Finland could even correct the "wife" part, Sweden interjected. "'f th's 's h'w 't w'll b', y'ur b'st fr'en' 's a d'sgust'ng m'n w'th a d'gust'ng br'th'r c'mpl'x!" Sweden roared back at the Dane.

The mentioned nation emitted a horrifying aura, Norway slowly grabbed Denmark's shoulder before saying, "If you don't come up with a better insult then I'll destroy that stupid mermaid crap you care so much about." The Norwegian pushed the Dane forward, towards his frenemy. "Why couldn't you ask for him to stop?!" Finland desperately asked, Norway only shrugged as response. Denmark searched for more insults to spur out, "Your dog is so stupid, it pisses on everything!" Denmark's comment only made Hanatamgo look down in shame. _How is that going to offend Sweden as much as he offended Norway?_ Iceland thought to himself. "Y'u ar' fr'ends with Norw'y 'nd 'cel'nd, th' tw' b'gg'st fr'aks th't ev'r ex'st'd!" Sweden shouted with maximum rage. "Why are you offending me?!" The confused Icelandic nation asked, no one responded to his question.

However, something within Norway had snapped. "You two…" He didn't finish his sentence as he slowly walked towards the arguing duo whilst rolling up his sleeves, "You wanted a fight and now, you'll get it."

The next day, during the world meeting, Norway sat together with Finland and Iceland. "I nearly forgot, Sweden and Denmark owe me a piggy back ride around the hall." Norway bluntly stated, "But, I don't think they will be giving any piggy back ride to anyone in their current situation." Finland couldn't help but let out a small chuckle, after all they did deserve it.

* * *

**_Bonus scene:_**

In a nearby hospital, there laid two gravely wounded nations in separate beds. The white, dull room was surrounded by a pregnant silence, Denmark decided to break the silence and spoke to the other nation first, "Hey, wouldn't it be amazing if the other three served us in those extremely hot nurse outfit? Like the ones the nurses here were wearing." Sweden couldn't help but agree with the other brash nation, it would be erotic. He imagined his beloved wife wearing a cute nurse uniform and helping him with his painful condition until Denmark's interrupted once more, "I want the two brothers." Denmark says to no one in particular as he was still engrossed in his imagination.

"K'nk' b'st'rd."

* * *

Post-script:

Shirai: Sometimes, I think that these guys aren't as mature as they look...

Anyway! Please comment, constructive criticisms are thoroughly encouraged!


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